Today has been rough. I feel so helpless as a mother. I feel like I should be able to calm my baby and really take care of all of his needs, and its not the case here in the PICU. I can't do everything for him, I can't take away his pain. and its a horrible feeling.
Poor Brock has been in a lot of pain today. He has been getting some medicine for pain, but sometimes that doesn't always work and the poor little boy has had some really bad diaherria because of the antibiotics so his poor little bum is so red and hurts him so bad.
A lot of people keep asking me how we are doing. Its a hard question to answer. I feel like we are both handling this situation very well. There is no other way I feel like. This is the hand we were delt and we have to deal with it. This is our life now. But its been hard to cope with. You have all these hopes and dreams for your children and picture your life a certain way when you are pregnant with them, and now all of a sudden your life is totally different. Doctors, and surgeries and the possbility of mental and physical delays. But its our life! This is our reality now and we love our son so much and will do anything for him! Yes, I cry all the time thinking about how hard life could be for him, not the easy life we had thought about before he was born.
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